What Have I Done For You Lately?
In thinking about what I've done for my husband lately, I've been wondering if I really know what would light him up. Sure, I do the little things for him, mostly, I notice, having to do with food preparation. I know he appreciates it but what else would he really love? And, when's the last time I asked?
Gary Chapman, author of The Five Love Languages talks about the concept of knowing how our partner feel the most loved-- whether it's through acts of service, physical affection, gifts or words of affirmation. And, in relationships, we often differ from our partners in how we feel loved. So, sometimes we may be doing wonderful things for our partners, but they may long for something else instead. For instance, I appreciate that my husband brings me little gifts. But, if he didn't hug and kiss me every time I wanted, I would definitely not feel as loved. I need physical affection and lots of it.
Of course, if I ask my husband what he'd like me to do for him, his answer will probably be, "Uh..I dunno..." (whereas I feel like I could rattle off a million things), but I may be surprised. Maybe if asked and really encouraged to think about it, he would rattle off a big list too. If I don't ask, I might be missing all kinds of opportunities to really rock his world. And, believe me, in building a happy marriage that lasts a life time, I want to rock his world, and I want him to rock mine too!
For more on how to ask your partner to do wonderful things for you, see blog post, What Have You Done for Me Lately?"
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